Progress

So tomorrow is a big day, for my wife and the committee that coordinates the Women for Women golf tournament.  It’s a tournament that only women can play in and it raises money for the local women’s shelter.  They spend a year organizing this thing and it has always turned out pretty amazing. The ladies always seem to have a great time.  It’s quite an impressive event.  So much so that after they suspended doing the event the golf course that they use actually tracked them down and asked them to do it again.  Now my part in all this has been to take a volunteer day off from work and selflessly be the unofficial photographer for the event.  In my mind, I have always tried to be supportive and helpful to Mare for this occasion.  However, I used to be excited for the day before and it let me stay up late and get drunk while playing video games or watching TV.  I would then get up on the day of the event, usually late and feeling like a bag of shit, and slog my way over to the course to be as helpful as I could.  I even used to drink on the course while driving around taking pictures.  I mean they serve alcohol off of golf carts, and the clubhouse and the turning point grill.  Booze and golf have a close relationship.  It seems to me that about this time last year my life was really falling apart.  I was doing everything I could to keep it together including lying about my drinking and feeling like I was really trying to control it.  Mare had moved out for a while and was waiting for me to get some councilling.  I remember I didn’t drink at last year’s tournament.  That doesn’t mean I wasn’t hung over as fuck though.  This year is a different story for sure.  I am going to a meeting tonight instead of going to the LCBO and I have a list of productive things I need to get done tonight to help her out.  I am looking forward to spending the day in sunshine and I know that I will not be obsessing about where my next bottle will be located.  That’s some remarkable progress as far as I am concerned.

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