float

While I was sitting in the treatment house in Toronto I made a list of things that I wanted to try when I got back to real life.  A “bucket list” if you will.  One of the items I put on there was floating in a sensory deprivation tank.  Today I went and did it.  I am off for the week and while I was in Orlando visiting friends I couldn’t think fo a reason to not go and do it.  So I booked at room at a place called Float in Barrie.  Long story short, it was amazing.  They have a very nice setup that is meant to make it a very relaxing and pleasant experience.  I booked the room for one hour and they let you have time for a pre and post float shower.  The tank looks like a giant white coffin (it’s not I assure you), it has about ten inches of water in it and about 850lbs of Epsom salts.  The room itself is not a lot bigger than the tank itself but it has nice soft lighting and a shower in it.  I got undressed and had the obligatory shower and then proceeded to open the door of the tank.  Here’s the part that I think most people won’t be comfortable with.  You are meant to close the door behind you as you enter the tank head first.  This leaves no trace of sound or light in the tank.  Just you and the water.  The temperature of the water is just about exactly at body temperature, it never felt cold at all to me.  It’s not quite bath water, but way warmer than a pool.  I closed the door and lay back in the tank but initially it is a very odd sensation.  There is almost resistance to your body sinking.  Not like being on a bed and not like any water I’ve ever experienced before.  It felt like I was in suspended animation, more like I imagine space feels than what I know swimming to feel like.  There was no sense of anything but myself.  This is supposed to be another form of meditation, and my mind began to wander almost immediately.  But with my back feeling good, and my aches and pains having drifted away I started to feel pretty good.  I feel like it was almost impossible to tell that i was even in water.  Eventually i began to feel very relaxed and peaceful.  Content.

Here’s what I learned.  When it comes to my life, I AM MOST IMPORTANT, it is after all my life.  I need to start to thinking about things that I want to do.  I want to focus more on my health and on feeling better about myself.  I hesitate to say that I am going to do things “my way”, but I am not going to let everyone tell me how I am going to do things or what I am going to do.   This is my life and I only get one.  I do sometimes feel like I wasted a huge portion of my life already.  It’s time I do some things for me.  If Mare wants to be part of this journey then that’s cool.  If not, then I guess I have decisions to make.

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