insanity

I am told that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.  I have noticed that Mare is having trouble at work again.  She always blames everyone else in her office, she never has a part to play in things.  She is feeling hurt because she was left out of some meetings and a lunch.  She thinks that now her boss doesn’t like her and that she playing favorites with the staff.  This manager of hers is maybe not the best manager when it comes to business, but she is very passionate about her job.  Which is a great quality when it is married up with the ability to manage the people that are around you.  The problem as I see it is that they all take things far too personally.  Mare has had this problem in the past, and if she lets it get the best of her as I see that it has started to, she is going to be on her 3 career change.  Maybe that’s not unusual, but it doesn’t seem normal to me.  In every instance it’s been the same scenario, she stops getting along with people that she works with, she thinks that people don’t like her because she has a “strong personality”.  Then when people stop inviting her out to things, or she thinks they are talking about her behind her back she retaliates by playing up the strong willed personality.  She has never stepped back and said “shit, maybe I should try to get along with these people”, or “maybe I AM THE PROBLEM”.  Not once, it’s always been the finger pointed at everyone else.  I can totally relate to this in a way.  I couldn’t get out of myself when I was drinking, I couldn’t see how I was the one to blame for how I was behaving.  But I can only change ME.  I can’t do anything for her.  I’m starting to think that I don’t even want to help her.  If I say anything about this I am just going to be another person that she thinks is out to get her.  She is still angry with me and I really can’t talk to her about it.  She just will never listen to me.  That’s totally healthy right…..?

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