melancholy

This sums up my afternoon.  I’m feeling a bit down and I don’t know why.  I suppose it’s just the usual wave of depression that I tend to go through.  But it was compounded in a way when I started to remember my cat Max.  He passed away a while ago and it was not pleasant at all.  This cat was such a strong personality that he will always stick in my mind as one of my best friends.  When I was going through the worst of part of the end of my drinking Max never left my side.  He would always come and sleep with me when I was feeling really sick and stuck in bed.  He was always so good at reading my emotions and he could tell when I needed a friend.  He would nudge his head against mine and meow at me and then curl up on the pillow above my head.  Sadly he developed some truly awful symptoms that the vet felt was related to either a stroke or a brain tumor.  He stopped eating and began pacing the house calling out for help all the time.  He could not find his way to the litter box and then his world became so very limited as he kept himself stuck behind doors or in closets.  He had so many accidents that we eventually had to take him to get checked out.  That’s when we learned the awful truth of his condition.  The vet gave us one more day with him and then I had to take him in.  I stayed with him until the very end; holding his little white paw as he gently went to sleep.  It really broke my heart to have to do that.  I cried the whole drive home.

I miss you Max,

 

 

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